


I Almost Forgot You

by Loadsofgay



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Pennywise (IT), Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Some angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-21
Updated: 2018-03-31
Packaged: 2019-03-22 01:55:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13753809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Loadsofgay/pseuds/Loadsofgay
Summary: Eddie Kaspbrak had been the first person Richie Tozier came out as Bi to when they were 13. Eddie had freaked out and told Richie he didn't want to be his friend anymore. Richie thought this was because Eddie was homophobic, which in a sense, he was. Eddie freaked out due to his own struggles with sexuality and his crush on Richie. The two hadn't spoken since middle school. Now Eddie, his friends Bill, Stan, and Mike happened to go to the same college as Richie and his friends Bev and Ben. The two friend groups collide at a party and Richie drunkenly asks Eddie if he stopped being his friend because he was bisexual. Angst and suppressed feelings ensue.





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> Hiiii so this is based off an experience of mine but this will actually have a happy ending!!! Please let me know what you think!

Eddie made a face as he gulped down what he assumed to be a mixture of koolaid and vodka.

His friends Bill and Mike has forced him to come to this frat party convincing him he needed a break due to his intense studying for finals and finishing his first semester at college (with impeccable grades of course). Mike had wondered off to find the hosts of the party and thank them for supplying them with an impressive amount of alcohol, Mike had always been too nice for his own good. While Bill was texting his boyfriend (and Eddie's best friend) Stan, ensuring him he was safe and would make it back to their dorm on time. Eddie and Stan had started off the year sharing a dorm but, after one too many drinks and a long awaited confession of mutual pining, Stan and Bill finally started dating, and soon after, fucking. Now Eddie knew that new couples were super touchy feely and sexually active so for the first month or so he agreed to find something to do when they needed "alone time". After the first month of "Stenbrough" as Eddie and Mike liked to call it, Eddie decided it would be best for everyone if Eddie and Bill just switched rooms. So Mike and Eddie had become closer than ever after their time spent together. Eddie could definitely say he loved all of his friends so deeply it sometimes worried him. 

Eddie is pulled from his thoughts when someone bumps into him and he manages to spill his drink all over his arm. 

He huffs and the stranger walks by either too rude or too drunk to acknowledge Eddie and his sticky arm and frown set across his face. He rolls his eyes and tries to find a bathroom. He waits in a seemingly short line for the bathroom in some unknown frat boys bedroom. He hears the opening notes to Mr. Brightside by the killers and the line disappears as the 3 girls in front of him start screaming and run towards the room where sweaty bodies dance and cram together. If Eddie had drank more, he would have been one to run with them. There is nothing a bunch of drunk millennials love more than some Mr. Brightside. 

He makes his way into the bathroom and makes sure to lock the door and turns the faucet on so he can begin working on cleaning his sticky blue arm. He looks in the mirror and examines himself, Eddie finds it funny that all those years ago he was so fucking terrified to be himself. All because his mother shoved the idea that being gay was a sin and a one way ticket to hell down his throat. Now here he was standing in a bathroom at a frat party checking himself out. He was wearing an over sized lavender polo t shirt with the sleeves rolled up that was tucked into his high wasted blue jeans, cuffed at the bottom because no matter how hard he looked, he could never find jeans that fit right, and a pair of black high top converse. 

When Eddie left for college (with a full ride) he was finally able to be himself and one of his favorite ways to express himself was through what he wore. He had always loved light pastel colors but once he turned 12 his mom insisted he wore more manly clothes and forced him to retire his light colored t shirts and shorts. 

Eddie washes off his arm and dries it off with a questionable towel he found on the counter. He leans in close to the mirror to fix his hair, he has it grown out and its wavy, borderline curly. Dark and thick and shiny. Eddie has always found his hair to be one of his most flattering features especially when is comes past his ears and curls inwards. He brushed his fingers over his faded freckles and leans back. Once he is satisfied with the way his hair is laying, he walks out of the bathroom and looks for his friends. 

He makes his way down the hallway squeezing through sweaty bodies and couples shoved against the wall sucking face. He makes his way to the room where the music is the lowest and there are a few couches. He sees Bill and Mike accompanied by 3 other people he doesn't quite recognize. As he gets closer, he registers red short hair, belonging to a girl in baggy black jeans and a striped crop top, A broad shouldered man with wavy light brown hair wearing a jean jacket and black jeans, and a curly mess of dark hair belonging to a tall and skinny man wearing dark ripped jeans, an ACDC shirt and glasses that make his eyes look almost too big for his face. The last man seems familiar, almost like Eddie knew him long ago. The 5 are invested in a seemingly interesting conversation as Eddie enters their small circle. He leans into Mike and Mike instinctively wraps his arm around the smaller boy. Eddie looks around the circle and his eyes land on the tall one with the glasses, he is talking to Bill and his face is so expressive but his words are slurring together a bit. 

Bill then realizes Eddie has joined them and reaches over to Eddie to pull him close and as he opens his mouth to introduce him, the man with glasses interrupts him  
"Well I'll be damned" he exclaims. "Eddie fucking Kaspbrak." he smirks

Then everything clicks in Eddie's mind. Richie Tozier, his childhood best friend that he turned his back on. Eddie's eyes go wide and he steps out of Bill's grasp and does the first thing he can think of.  
He wraps his arms around Richie's neck, practically throwing himself into his arms. Richie, caught off guard, wraps his arms around Eddie's small waist and squeezes. 

"Holy shit! This is the Eddie Kaspbrak?" a voice says, Eddie assumes it's the girl with the short red hair. 

Eddie takes a large step back and suddenly is very self conscious of the fact that he just latched on the the man he hasn't spoken to in 6 years. 

Richie's wide eyes remain on Eddie for a little longer than necessary before he snaps out of whatever trance like state he was in. "The very one Bev." he says to the girl, Bev, Eddie thinks. It suits her. 

"Wait, I'm confused here." Bill says and the man with wavy hair standing beside Bev nods in agreement. 

"This here is the Eddie that ripped my heart out all those years ago, remember now? Hasn't spoken to me since I told him my biggest secret. Well my biggest secret in the 8th grade that is." Richie says, his voice slightly harsh.

Eddie winces, he remembers exactly how it happened. Richie had cried, and Eddie had lied. 

"Wait, this is the Richie you always used to talk about?" Bill exclaims

Eddie nods, refusing to break eye contact with Richie, hoping he won't have to say the words he is dreading more than anything, wishing Richie would understand by just looking him in the eyes. 

"Well it's a pleasure to meet the famous, or infamous Eddie, i'm Ben." The man with the wavy brown hair says. 

"Look, we all have changed a lot since then, hopefully there are no hard feelings..." Mike tries maintaining some sense of peace. 

"Richie, can we talk..." Richie looks dismissive. "please?" Eddie adds.

Richie simply huffs and gives a small nod, Eddie makes eye contact with Bill and Mike and they give him their nod of approval. 

Eddie starts walking down the hallway, hoping Richie is still behind him. He finds an empty bedroom and walks in, Richie follows and shuts the door behind him. 

"Okay Eddie, you have me alone. What do you want?" Richie slurs as he sits on the bed. Eddie sits beside him.

"I just wanted to sa-" Richie cuts him off. 

"Did you stop being my friend because i'm bi?" He forces out quickly. 

"Richie listen, this is a lot but i'm just gonna sum it up." He paused looking at Richie, who was giving him this look that screamed "go on already".

"When you told me you were bisexual, I absolutely freaked out. Not because of who you are but because I was so scared of who I was. If you didn't know, I am gay... like very gay. It's just, growing up, my mother always told me how wrong being gay was and how dangerous it could be, so I was terrified. I convinced myself that I could make myself like girls. The reason it freaked me out so much when you came out was because, you were the first boy I ever had feelings for..." He paused and looked at Richie, his expression was unreadable. Eddie focused his sight back on his fingers. "But I knew you liked girls because of how much you talked about kissing them and everything, but when you told me that you liked boys too., it became too real for me. All I could think about was you and I couldn't let myself get any closer to you than I already was." Richie sighed "I know it doesn't make sense or justify the way I treated you but, I just wanted you to know i'm sorry... for everything."

Eddie looked back at Richie and he was staring at his feet, deep in thought. Eddie waited for a response but after minutes of nothing he stood to leave. He took one last look at Richie and sighed, turning and heading for the door. As he was reaching for the handle, a hand grabbed his shoulder and turned him around.

"I'm gonna be honest Eddie, I can't say that I forgive you because what you did really fucked me up for a long time," he paused and took a deep breath. "but i really want to, so can we maybe try to be friends again?" He dropped his hand from Eddie's shoulder. 

"I'd like that... more than anything." Eddie said, a small smile creeping up his face.


	2. Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope everyone is enjoying this so far!! your comments are the only motivation i have so if you want more please tell me!! and feel free to leave suggestions and criticisms!!! love love love

The next morning Richie woke up with a pounding in his head, a new found sensitivity to light, and a dry mouth. 

He reached over to his bedside table knocking many things over until he felt the crinkle of a half full water bottle. After chugging the remaining contents of the bottle, he chucked it across the room somewhere. Richie looked over to Ben's side of the room and found an empty and sloppily made bed. He leaned up into a sitting position and blindly felt around the small table for his glasses. After poking himself in the eye, he successfully perched his glasses upon his nose. Pushing himself out of bed, his lanky legs lead him to the bathroom. He quickly relieves himself and pisses for what seems like 4 minutes straight before tugging his shirt over his head and his sweatpants and underwear off in one go, and uses his foot to flush the toilet. After scrubbing his teeth and tongue for a solid minute, he spits and does his best to rinse out the taste of alcohol. He then turns the shower on and waits for the water to heat up. 

As he steps into the water the heat engulfs him and he closes his eyes and leans up against the shower wall. He lets his mind wander to the events of last night, he remembers dancing with Bev and Ben, chugging red solo cups filled with mystery juice, "yeeting" one of these empty red solo cups, getting dirty looks from frat boys, and... Oh yeah, running into his old best friend and first crush Eddie Kaspbrak. Richie fills his hand with a drop of shampoo and scrubs his scalp and does his best not to let his fingers tangle into his long ass hair. He and Eddie had made up?? He remembers Eddie's apology, and Eddie's confession. He remembers how his stomach had jumped when Eddie had said it. Richie didn't know how to react. He rinses his hair. Now grabbing a rag and loading it up with a few pumps of body wash. Richie was in utter shock when Eddie had revealed to him that he was gay. Richie remembers the way his heart broke when Eddie broke their friendship. He told himself he would never like a straight boy again, for it had hurt too much. But.. Eddie?? wasn't?? gay???? what?? Richie's mind was running a mile a minute. Just seeing the smaller boy with the freckled face and wavy chocolate hair had sent butterflies flying through his tummy. The fact that Eddie had actually had feelings for him too at one point was just too much. Richie knew Eddie is very easily frightened, he knew he couldn't possibly tell him that he liked him. Then Eddie would leave him again. 

After scrubbing himself down, Richie rinsed off and hopped out of the shower. Like literally hopped (dumbass) he slipped and hit his knee on the edge of the tub "fucking fuck!" he exclaims. 

He hears giggles and a "You good in there Rich?" it's Bev

Richie gives a huff and wraps a towel around his waist and he heads out back into the dorm room. He sees Bev laying on Ben's bed and Ben sitting at his desk pulling to go boxes out of a brown bag.

"No worries, just busted my fucking knee cap." Richie walks closer to the desk and starts trying to grab at the bag Ben was pulling food out of "Ooh breakfast!" 

Ben swats his hands away, "lunch actually, go get dressed you freak." Ben says.

Richie walks over to his bedside table and clicks his phones home button. His phone says 1:42 pm, he also has missed calls from Bev, and a text message from an unknown number. He takes his phone off his charger and flops down criss cross on his bed. 

"This is Eddie, you told me to text you so you'd have my number." the text reads. Richie smirks and adds the number to his contacts as "Long Lost Eddie".

He ponders a reply for a few moments before typing out a quick "Hey Eddie, how is your morning?" Richie feels weird. How do you talk to someone who used to be your best friend but haven't spoken to in years. 

"Hey Richie do you have any- Fuck Rich! I just saw way more of you than I ever fucking wanted to!" Bev shouts as she turns towards Richie before spotting him with his legs spread open, and quickly shoves her face into a pillow. 

Richie and Ben both bust out laughing, as Bev keeps her face flush against the pillow. 

"Trust me Bev, that was nothing compared to the things i've seen as his roommate." Ben walks over to the bed with two boxes and and sits beside her, pressing a kiss to the side of her head. She leans up and takes the box with a smile. 

Richie watches the small exchange with a grin, and he gets out of bed once again heading to his closet. He settles on some ripped black jeans and a maroon sweatshirt. throwing on some socks and all black high top chucks. 

He walks over to the bag and finds it empty "Okay, I know I can be an asshole but what the fuck? where is my hangover cure meal??" He says dramatically turning around eyeing Ben and Bev. 

"Sorry Rich, we tried waking you up multiple times this morning and I called you when we were ordering lunch, we weren't sure you were going to wake up at all today!" Ben says with a slightly apologetic shrug. Bev gives a small smile and a look that sort of says "starve asshole" in a loving way of course.

Richie huffs and shoves his phone into his back pocket and heads towards the door "And to think I once considered you my friends!" He uses some voice and shuts the door behind him. 

Once he reaches the elevator he pushes the ground floor button and waits for the doors to shut before pulling his phone out and unintentionally smiling as he sees a new text from Eddie. 

"Eventful, apparently Bill lost a sock last night? How he lost a sock and not a shoe is beyond me, but according to Bill this was a special sock. So I spent my morning searching a frat house for a sock." Richie chuckled at Eddie's message

"But..... did you find the sock?" Richie hit send. 

The elevator dinged and Richie almost stepped off before realizing it had stopped on the 6th floor instead of the 1st.

A boy with curly ringlets and a soft looking sweater stepped on, Richie noticed he was wearing loafers... This is college, who the fuck wears loafers. The boy smelled overwhelmingly like soap and Richie could have sworn his skin was shining with how spotless his face looked. 

"Is there something I can do for you?" The man sassed. 

Richie became hyper aware of how intensely he was staring. 

"Oh sorry man, just admiring." Richie replied.

The man scoffed and looked towards the elevator doors. 

When they dinged open on the 1st floor Richie headed towards the exit doors, and made his way to the cafeteria. 

Feeling his phone vibrate, he reached into his back pocket and unlocked his phone. 

"Yes. Though I really don't think you want to know where." 

Richie typed quickly "try me." and hit send.

After walking 3 blocks he finally reached the cafeteria where he ordered his usual hangover cure, An omelet with turkey and cheese, hash browns, and a coke.

He waited for his order and sat at a table nearby. One of Richie's favorite things to do was people watch. He liked trying to figure people out with just a brief observation. He glanced around finding a few people looking like they were cramming to get their homework done that was due Sunday so they had time to party tonight. For some reason Frat parties always fell on Saturdays. 

He looked out the window and saw a familiar short boy with wavy brown hair blowing into his face. Eddie. He tried desperately to tuck his hair behind his ears but it was too short to stay but too long to stay out of his eyes. He gave up and shoved his hands into the pockets of his cardigan, which looked 2 sizes too big. His light blue jeans hugged his legs nicely and were rolled up just above his ankle boots. He looked effortlessly beautiful Richie noted. He pushed the doors open and marched towards the counter. One thing that Richie noticed about Eddie that hadn't changed was that Eddie always walked with purpose, even though he was slightly pigeon toed. 

Once Eddie reached the counter he picked up a bag with his name on it and turned to leave, Richie contemplated saying something but Eddie beat him to it. 

"Oh hey Richie." He smiled warmly

"Hey Eddie spaghetti-" the nickname slipped, "uh sorry, I hope that wasn't weird. It's just kinda weird ya know? we haven't spoken in so long and i'm kind of confused on how we're supposed to do this an-" He was cut off 

"Hey, it's okay, I never thought I'd say this but I kind of missed it." Eddie blushed, Richie liked it when he did that. 

"Richie?" A man at the counter called out, Richie stood to retrieve his food. 

"So um Richie, I was gonna ask you, all my friends and I are going to this coffee house in the city tonight if you wanted to come? You can bring Bev and Ben." He rushed out like he was nervous. All Richie could think was cute cute cute.

"Sounds good to me, just text me the details?" Richie said,

Eddie nodded, Richie wasn't sure what kind of goodbye this situation so he reached out an touched Eddie's shoulder with his free hand. "I'm really glad I saw you last night." He says. 

"Me too Rich, really glad." And with that Eddie placed his hand over Richie's for a brief moment before turning on his heel and walked towards the door. 

Richie for once, wasn't sad to see Eddie walk away, for there was a promise of seeing him again. The simple touch of their hands ensured him of that.


	3. Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi!! if you want to send me suggestions or requests, feel free to ask me on tumblr ( https://loadsofgayy.tumblr.com/ ) i am so happy people are actually reading this!! i love when i get comments!! thank you for reading,,, hereeee we goooooo

Eddie stood in his dorm room in nothing but pink and white polka dot briefs.

He had emptied what seemed to be the entirety of his closet on his small bed, trying to find something that suited his mood for the night.  
All his friends, and Richie's were going to the Gypsy coffee house tonight, and Eddie was not worried about what to wear because of Richie... Well that's what he kept telling himself at least. It had gotten significantly colder the later it got so his previous outfit of a light cardigan wouldn't do. 

"Eddie, it's been like 20 minutes and you have made absolutely no progress, should I be worried." Mike piped up from his spot on his bed where he was working on some history paper.

Eddie gave a slight huff before grabbing a dark green thick wool sweater and throwing it over his head, matching it with a pair of light blue jeans that hugged his thighs the right way. Eddie was a sucker for converse and he had at least 6 pairs. Reaching for his white hightops and a pair of grey wool socks ( it's cold, leave my boy alone ). 

"Eddie, you haven't even made a comment on what i'm wearing and how not all greys go together." Mike said as he stood from his bed and walked over towards Eddie helping him put his clothes back into his closet. "You know you can talk to me." Eddie felt Mike's gaze on the side of his face. The thing about Mike was he was the best person to go to when you wanted advice, and he didn't sugar coat it, but he also made it sound so kind even if what he was saying could have been taken as slightly offensive. The only word Eddie thought of when he thought of Mike was pure. 

Eddie groaned dramatically as he flopped down on the bed towards Mike. "Seeing Richie again just brought back a lot of feelings. Some good, some really, really bad." Mike gave a slight smirk at the fact that he convinced Eddie to talk, Mike probably thinks Eddie didn't see it, but he did. Mike gave Eddie a look that said : go on, you know i'm here to listen.

"It's really nice that we're talking again because, he was such a good friend. He always knew how to cheer me up and make me forget about why I was even sad in the first place. It was just so easy being around Richie, everything was just so easy with him. He is such a caring person and he is so expressive it's really something Mike I mean it." Eddie paused to look at Mike, he was giving him a fond smile. Eddie realized he was gushing.

"But then there's the bad stuff... Like when I look at him all I can think about is how bad I hurt him. I can feel it, I swear to god I can feel his pain. I see it in his eyes and I feel it in my chest. I don't like hurting people period but, hurting Richie, hurt me. I hate who I was when I did that to him, and it's like, what if that me is still in here?" Eddie pointed to his chest as he said this. "What if I hurt Richie again, what if I can't make it better, and what if he remembers how horrible I was and he doesn't want anything to do with me?" Eddie sounds a little winded at how fast he poured all those words out.

Mike places a hand on Eddie's knee. "Eds, look at me." He pauses, Eddie hesitantly raises his eyes from his shaking hands to Mike's brown eyes, pure, he thinks. "You can't think like that, it won't do you or Richie any good. If you go into this thinking it will fail, it will. Friendships are so important Eddie, what you and Richie went through was shit but if you're friendship was as strong as you say, it can be fixed. Trust me." Eddie does.

"Now let's go get the lovebirds." Mike hops off the bed walking towards the door. 

"We should call first, remember last time?" Eddie shivers with a grimace.

"You're right, who knew you could do that with chocolate syrup?" Mike opens the door as Eddie dials Stan to inform him they're on the way. 

\----------

Bill, Stan, Mike, and Eddie have been sitting in a corner booth for about twenty minutes sipping on their overpriced drinks and chatting over the quiet live music and hum of coffee machines and the other customers. 

Bill and Stan are sitting in the corner by the window and Mike is beside them, Eddie is sitting on the opposite side of the table with his legs brought up to his chest as he checks his phone every 40 seconds for the time. 

"Eddie will you calm down, they'll be here. You told them 9 right? It's only 9:04." Stan says with an eye roll. 

"Yeah Eds, j-just give them a m-m-minute." Bill says before taking a large gulp of his espresso.

Eddie looked out the window he was sitting by and watched the light rain hit the pavement, the pavement was just wet enough to where it reflected the city lights off of it. Eddie always had preferred the city, all the different colored lights making stars of their own. This cold, big city had felt more like home than Derry ever had. Eddie remembers the only time he felt safe or like he was a part of a family was when he was with his friends. He remembers the promise he and Richie had made when they were 11, they sat under a tree on top of a hill looking over Derry. Richie had told Eddie that if either of them left, they had to go together. Richie had promised he would always take care of Eddie. This was the first time he thought he might have liked to kiss Richie. As he sat on top of that hill looking at the seemingly endless sky, he thought he could find the end of the sky, and he wanted to find it with Richie. 

A laugh from Stan snapped Eddie out of his mind, and he glanced towards the door. 

A beautiful girl with short but curly red hair stepped through the door, she had a hood pulled over her face and water dripped off of it. Bev. Behind her a tall man with a kind face. Ben. Then Richie. He was wearing a black sweater, blue jeans, and all black converse. His hair was wet and dripping onto his face, water droplets on his glasses. They were all laughing and smiling,( Eddie thought Richie's smile shined the brightest ) Ben was shaking his hair in Beverly's face and she was hitting him gently. Richie surveyed the small cafe and his smile grew wide when he spotted Eddie. Eddie unintentionally returned the face splitting smile, causing Bill, Stan, and Mike to turn to see why Eddie had a goofy ass look on his face. 

The 3 slightly wetter friends joined the other 4 at the small booth. Richie scooting in beside Eddie (thank fuck), and Bev and Ben squeezing in beside him. 

"Hello comrades, so this is what you look like when i'm sober-" Richie looked across the table "-hey! I know you, you're pretty elevator boy!" He exclaimed when his eyes landed on Stan.

Bill gave a look to Richie and a possessive squeeze to Stan's thigh. "Hey! You're creepy starey lanky boy!" Stan retorted. 

Richie laughed loudly, his arms reaching to the back of the booth, one behind Eddie, one behind Bev. 

"Don't worry big Bill, sassy there is all yours." Richie said. 

"My name is Stanley, and you must be Trashmouth." Stan gave a smug smile, Bill elbowed him. Eddie gave Bill a look because only Bill knew Richie's old nickname, Eddie had told him in slightly drunken confidence. 

"Oh Stan, how you wound me!" Richie clutched his chest with his left hand, meaning his arm was only around Eddie now. Eddie blushed when he realized this. 

"Eds st-started to th-th-think you weren't coming." Bill said and before Eddie could defend himself, Richie piped up. "Well to be fair, we were running a little late." His voice was smooth. 

"I was just worried, maybe you guys had gotten lost." Eddie tried, Richie nudged his leg and smiled, saying : hey it's okay. 

"Well since nobody else is going to introduce us, I am Beverly Marsh, this-" she points toward Ben -"is Ben Hanscom." She reaches her arm across the table toward Stan successfully elbowing Richie in the gut, Stan takes her hand and gives it a firm shake, "I like you already." Stan says as he then reaches for Ben's hand.

"So have you guys ever been here before?" Mike asks

"No siree, we are-" Richie lowers his voice as he looks around. "- virgins." 

Eddie gives a slight giggle at this.

"I'll go get us some drinks, what do you guys want?" Ben starts to get up

"Oh, wait a minute! okay so since it's your first time here we have to play our game." Mike says, Ben sits back down clearly intrigued.

"Okay so basically we all have to buy each other a drink and we get to pick each other's drinks, then we mix them all up and we all pick one, it's kind of like Russian roulette-" Richie cuts Eddie off, "Except completely different." Eddie elbows him "-fuck off Richie, it's fun!" Eddie insists, Richie is still laughing from hearing Eddie so excited about a silly little game. Eddie thinks there is nothing more beautiful than when Richie laughs. 

They all get up from the booth, besides Stan because he insists someone needs to stay behind to save the table. 

After picking, paying for, and carrying the seven drinks, they begin mixing the drinks around the small table doing their best not to spill.

Richie, Bev, and Ben get to pick first since it's their first time. Richie reached for the one in the small and wide green cup. Beverly reaches for the iced one in a tall and skinny glass. Ben grabs for the dark looking brew in a red mug. Stan then reaches for the one with all the whip cream on top. Eddie grabs on that is in a small yellow mug that is a cream color with lots of whipped cream. Mike reaches for an iced one, and Bill for the mysterious one that for some reason looks purple on top? Everyone is worried for him.

Ben starts the countdown from 5 and they all join in by 3..2..1 

Ben makes a soft hmmm indicating his drink is good.  
Bev has no reaction whatsoever, just says "It tastes like coffee."  
Richie makes a face and scrunches up his nose but still manages to swallow his mouthful before saying "Of fucking course its pumpkin spice, my nemesis!"  
Mike spits his back into the cup and sighs.  
Stan slurps his happily with a quiet moan.  
Bill sips his and his face is priceless before he starts exclaiming on why it's the best drink he's ever tasted.  
Eddie drinks his and hums and pulls away with a mustache of cream on his lip. 

Richie is the first to notice and laughs before reaching to boop Eddies nose and exclaiming: "Cute! cute! cute!" 

Eddie blushes and grabs his napkin to wipe the cream off his lip. Richie watches for a few moments longer than he should before realizing and forcing himself to look away.

The rest of the night is easy. They talk about everything and nothing for hours, at 11:30, a half hour before close, they decide to walk around town a bit, the rain has let up and they all agree they have enough layers to brace the cold. 

Due to the way they are sitting, Eddie and Richie fall into the back as only two people can fit on the sidewalk as they walk outside. Bev and Stan are talking about art, While Ben, Mike, and Bill talk about sports and literature. Eddie and Richie start talking about their majors at first, Eddie finds out Richie is majoring in theater and cinematography, Richie learns that Eddie is majoring in psychology, he wants to be a therapist. After talking about school Richie finally says something Eddie was hoping for. 

"So I know I've sort of already said this but I've really missed you Eds." He pauses and looks at Eddie, Richie thinks Eddie is proper beautiful, the way his curly hair hugs his ears and pink cheeks, his eyes are so big and brown, shimmering in the street lights. "You mean a whole lot to me." Eddie thinks about a reply but Richie continues, "When you left, I was so lost. I didn't know what to do, I was scared because I didn't have you anymore to keep me good, I would end up fucked up and stuck in Derry forever. You made me a good person, and I know you don't want to hear this, hell i'm not even sure I want to say it but I know I need to. I just think you should know, if it weren't for Bev and Ben, I don't know where i'd be. And i'm not blaming you at all! I know you were going through all types of shit that I can't even begin to imagine. I'm just saying that I want us to be how we were before, I just want you to know, if you're doubting anything, tell me now because I can't go through that again. I won't." Richie's voice was slightly shaking by now, Eddie grabbed his hand and stopped walking, turning towards him.

"Richie, you mean so damn much to me and if I could go back and time and change how things happened I would, no hesitation. But i can't, I know I can't, I am going to do everything I can to gain your trust again, I am not so sure that I deserve it but i'm selfish so I want it. You are part of my life, you will always will be, but I would rather remember you differently than how things ended so long ago. It's you and me Rich." Eddie squeezed his hands as he said this.

"You and me." Richie repeated.

"Come on slow pokes!" This was Bev.

Richie gave Eddie's hand a squeeze before letting go and walking towards their friends.

Eddie smiled as he saw Richie trip over himself in his rush to catch up, Richie turned to make sure Eddie was coming, a big smile on his face. 

Richie and Eddie both realized in the exact same moment, that they were fucked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eddie and Mike's friendship is so underrated so i'm trying to give lots of it in this story!! Are there any other relationships or friendships you want to see more or less of??


	4. NOT A CHAPTER!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hey you guys so i have gotten so so busy with work and school so i haven’t had much time to update so i was hoping maybe one of you might want to co write this with me??? if you’re interested message me on tumblr my user is loadsofgayy. lots of love!!

i’m so so sorry that this isn’t an actual update please forgive my bitch ass


	5. Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I AM THE WORST... I am so fucking sorry this chapter took so long, please forgive me and enjoy.

Richie always knew he loved too hard for his own good.

He had always grown up loving his parents with everything he had, his mother always tried her best to make up for the love of two parents. Wentworth never understood parenting, saw it more as a part of life and something he had to do. Never something he wanted. To him Richie was just a thing he had to pay for until he was 18. To Maggie, Richie was everything, even though he could often be a lot to handle, children with adhd always were, she loved him the best she could. Though Richie always felt he loved his father more than he deserved to be loved. 

With his friendships, Richie was practically obsessed with his friends. He thought about them all the time. He loved making them smile, it made him feel warm. 

Richie met Bev when he was 16. He was in the small thrift store in Derry, looking for clothes he could "bring back" as he liked to call it. As he was looking at a black silk button up, he noticed a small girl with red frizzy hair eyeing the same shirt. They began arguing over the shirt for at least 15 minutes. Bev was the one to take the shirt home. After spending the better of the dsy in the thrift store together, the two shared a cigarette and talked about stupid shit, like who their favorite desperate housewife was. 

Shortly after, Richie spent some time in the small town library reading books about law. ( he would kill someone if they brought this up ) He thought he might like to become a civil rights lawyer. He bumped into a strong looking guy with a soft face. They talked books and comics until they were kicked out of the library. 

Richie made sure Ben sat with he and Bev at lunch the following day. 

When Richie met Bev, he knew right away her smile would mean too much to him. He thought she was beautiful and too sweet for her own good. With Bev, came Ben. Ben was exquisite in Richie's eyes. He always had pink cheeks, and a warm smile spread across his handsome face. If Richie could describe his best friends with one word, he would use the word good. He often thought his friends were too good for him. Richie's biggest fear has always been being alone and forgotten. 

One year when Richie was turning 17, Bev and Ben thought it would be funny to pretend they forgot his birthday. All day at school Richie waited for some sort of birthday surprise or even a simple "happy birthday", but it never came. Richie went home that day, locked himself in his room, and cried. Bev and Ben busted into his room that evening, cake and balloons in hand, to find Richie with tear stained cheeks, sleeping and clutching his pillow. Needless to say Bev and Ben never played a trick like that on Richie ever again. 

After this Bev and Ben texted Richie every single morning just saying, hello. This daily occurrence warmed Richie's heart.

Richie thought of these things as he layed in his bed as Ben and Bev play fought on the dorm room floor. 

"I love you guys." He blurted without thinking. 

The two paused their actions and looked at him. 

"We love you too Rich." they said, then went back to their battle. 

Richie smiled, friendship was meant to be easy, and theirs was. 

\------

"So where was the fucking sock?" Richie says as Eddie takes a sip from his smoothie.

Eddie gulps and holds back a laugh.

"Richie are you kidding me? I thought you forgot about that." Eddie says.

Richie fiddles with the rip in his jeans. "You never told me! how am i supposed to rest never knowing where Bill's sock was found."

Eddie takes a deep breath. "Okay, just remember this was at a frat party... Bill doesn't remember how his sock came off his foot but he found it in a bedroom and apparently... some had uh used it as a um..." Eddie bit his lip.

"What Eds? the suspense is killing me!" Richie moves to the edge of his seat.

"basically, the sock um... it hadcuminit." he rushed out the last part. 

Richie squawked, that's seriously the best way to describe the noise he made.

Eddie buried his face into the sleeve of his sweater and tried to hide his face. At least half of the cafeteria was looking at them now. 

Richie finally caught his breath. "Holy fucking shit. Please tell me Bill didn't-" Eddie cut him off

"Of course not! That sock is long gone."

"May he rest in peace." Richie bowed his head. Eddie threw his straw wrapper at his head. 

Richie popped his head up and grinned. So did Eddie.

For a few moments, they stayed like that, smiling at each other. When Richie noticed Eddie's gaze set on his lips he looked away.

"So whats the plan for today spaghetti?" He said looking out the window. 

Eddie snapped himself out of his trance. "They're having a showing of Forrest Gump when it gets dark in the south oval, if you want we can check it out." Eddie bit his lip nervously. Richie hated when he did that. It did things to him.

"Sounds good, I think the others all have shit to do today so it's just you and me." You and me... Richie remembered. 

Eddie game him a soft smile. 

They headed back to their separate dorms, promising to meet at the oval when it got dark.

\----

Eddie and Richie sat on a blanket on the ground outside as the movie played on the screen. It was 57 degrees so each of them were wearing a sweater and jeans. 

"You know Eds," Richie hadn't been looking at the screen for a few minutes now, he had been admiring Eddie. "I've always loved your nose." Richie always had a problem with word vomiting. He had meant to make a comment on how he'd do Tom Hanks. 

Eddie's eyes went wide and he turned his head. The way Richie was looking at him made his chest warm and his mouth a little wetter. He bit his lip before opening his mouth to respond before Richie cut him off, fuck it he thought, i'm going for it.

"And there you go biting your fucking lip, you're too cute Eds." Richie sat up into a sitting position. 

"Richie, what are you-" Eddie tried.

"Just let me say this Eddie, while i have the confidence, okay?" Eddie nodded. Richie took a breath. "Becoming friends with you again has been amazing Eddie but I've always liked to keep things out in the open. I think you're beautiful, in every way someone can be and, I just need to know now if what's been going on is mutual flirting or if this is all platonic because if it is I cant shut this shit off now before I get hurt again." He looked deep into Eddie's eyes as he said this.

For a few moments, Eddie said nothing. Just stared at him. His eyes were wide and Richie thought he looked terrified. Richie was contemplating getting up to leave when Eddie surged himself forward rather forcefully and pressing his lips into Richie's so hard he may have busted his lip. He pulled away immediately, scared he may have hurt him. 

Richie smirked before leaning back in, much softer this time. He brushed his lips against Eddies, slowly so Eddie could pull away if he changed his mind. Eddie pushed his lips into Richie's with slight force, and he felt Richie grin before swiping his tongue across his bottom lip. Eddie opened his mouth and felt Richie's smooth tongue brush against his own. 

Richie and Eddie both jolted awake in their separate beds and sighed. 

It was getting dark outside, they both headed out to meet at the oval for the movie, pushing their dream to the back of their minds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAHHAHHA i suck i'm sorry.... DID YOU THINK IT WOULD BE SO EASY?? also the fact that they both had the exact same dream at the same time is kind of a hint at soulmates yike im trash!! PLS comment what you think. lots of love!!


	6. Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Richie has a rough week. Eddie has a rough week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SOOOOO I have had the absolute week and i am in an angsty mood so you are all going to suffer for it am so sorry, feel my pain with me please. Also I know i skipped the movie "date" but it was uneventful and didn't feel right when i wrote it, im soooooorryy. there is some fluff to make up for the sad sooooooooo...

Eddie never thought he could hate his mother anymore than he already did. 

He thought when he left for college, that would be the end of their relationship. He had no ties with her, he paid for his phone and he went to college on scholarship. Though he was too good of a son to completely ignore her. He knew she didn't deserve it. She had mentally abused him all his life, and loved only the idea of him. She loved the perfect Eddie Kaspbrak, the Eddie that made straight A's and took his medicine when his watch beeped every fucking hour. 

What she didn't like was the Eddie that argued with her and told her at 14 that he knew his medication was bullshit and he wouldn't swallow another pill. Or the Eddie that she caught looking at a male model magazine in quite a compromising position. 

For some unknown reason, Eddie agreed to skype her once a week. 

This week, she had told him she wanted him to come home from college. He told her he couldn't or he would lose his scholarship and wouldn't be able to return. After an hour of her trying to convince him she was ill, he told her she would be fine and that he had studying to get back to. She cried, claiming he didn't care about her and that he had changed since he left. She told him he was turning into his father. Eddie didn't know anything about his father besides what she told him, that he left her because he was bored. She told him that his father was a cruel man that beat her. He didn't know what to think considering she had lied to him for years about being sick. He told her goodbye, and slammed his laptop shut. 

Eddie was a good son, so he called her physician, asking if anything was wrong, of course nothing was. 

Eddie didn't exactly know why this conversation upset him so much, he was used to this. Though this week with all his homework building up and his frustration with Mike about never cleaning up after himself, he broke. 

Eddie had always suffered from anxiety, the only medication he actually needed in his entire life. 

He had already been anxious due to his classes getting significantly harder. Eddie had always had a thing with germs and messiness. Mike was generally good about keeping things clean but he had been so busy with work and class that he hadn't had time to clean things up. Eddie understood, but his anxiety didn't. 

Clutter made Eddie anxious, so when he had gotten back to his dorm that day and seen how cluttered the room was he tried to stay calm but after the call with his mother, he couldn't. 

Eddie sank his face into his pillow and tried to keep his breathing calm. He stayed like this for what he thought was minutes but he heard the door opening and knew Mike had returned. 

Mike heard Eddie's panicky breaths and reached for his back, rubbing small comforting patterns into his sweater. 

This helped calm Eddie down a bit, enough to sit up and face Mike. 

Mike always knew how to talk Eddie out of his panic attacks, so he tried. 

"You know work today was a bitch Eddie, there were so many asshole customers that kept complaining about every little thing. Things I can't possibly control. There was one who asked to speak to the manager who told them the exact same thing. I am telling you, customer service is a bitch..." Mike rambled on for minutes and Eddie just listened, Mike had a calm yet strong voice that Eddie found soothing.

Eddie felt a pang of love and thankfulness in his heart. 

\----

Richie was a man of many words.

So when he was quiet, his friends knew something was wrong. 

He had entered his dorm that evening, slammed the door, thrown his bag in the corner and laid on the bed. 

Bev and Ben shared a look. 

One thing Richie did not like doing when he was upset, was talk. Richie was the type to cry when he spoke about his feelings, no matter emotion he was feeling, he would cry.

Ben left the room to get smoothies from the caf. 

Bev moved to Richie's bed "scoot." she said.

He huffed and moved over an inch. She picked his head up, sat criss cross apple sauce on the bed, and placed his head in her lap. 

As she ran her fingers through his hair, he let a few tears roll down his face and fall onto her thighs. 

"I know you hate it Rich, but talking is good." she said, she started making small braids throughout his curls. 

In whispered small voice that sounded like it was coming from a scared young boy Richie spoke. "Mom called today-" Bev's eyes widened a bit, that was rare. "She and the old Went are getting divorced." 

Bev leaned down and pressed a small kiss to Richie's forehead, he brought his hand up to her head and laid it there. He began shaking. His tears were falling out much quicker now. 

"I shouldn't feel sad, she'll be better without him. Just feels weird." his voice cracked. 

Ben entered the room saw the position they were in, set the smoothies down on the desk and went to lay beside Richie. He lay his head down on Bev's knee and wrapped his arm around Richie. This made Richie cry harder. 

Needless to stay they drank melted smoothies that night. 

\----

Richie and Eddie sat in the small coffee shop on campus with their laptops open and books scattered across the small table. 

"This coffee is so shitty compared to Gypsy. Even their pumpkin spice is better than anything here." Richie complained and made a face as he sipped his drink.

"If you hate it so much Rich, don't drink it." Eddie looked over the top of his laptop to see Richie smirking at him. 

"That my dear Eds, is a waste of money! We are college students, this may be the only thing i out in my body this week!" 

Eddie rolled his eyes and went back to his work. He was typing his 30 page research paper for sociology that was due in a week. He had insisted on finishing it early so he didn't have to stress about it. Richie was finishing up typing a short story that would be turned into a short film for his filmography class. 

Eddie was on page 19 and had already felt he ran out of things to talk about. He was writing his paper over gender neutrality and how we are socialized to fit a specific gender. As he reading over his work so far, his computer decided to crash. 

"No. No. No!" He looked as his computer in disbelief as he tried turning it on again. It was unresponsive. He knew Richie was looking at him, but he felt his chest start swelling. He stood up and rushed outside. 

He was only outside a moment before Richie was beside him, looking at him with wide eyes. 

Eddie's breath was picking up and he looked at Richie with panic on his face. "Can't -wheeze- breathe." he forced out

Richie didn't know what to do so he wrapped his arms around Eddie tightly and whispered into his ear, "Okay Eds listen to me-" Eddie's ear was pressed up against Richie's chest. "Do you hear my heart? focus on it." Eddie could hear the faint thumping of Richie's heart but it was difficult to focus on when his breathing was so loud. "Now breathe with me Eddie, breathe with me okay?" He pulled away and grabbed Eddie's arms steadying him so they were looking into each other's eyes.

Eddie focused on Richie's eyes, they were faking calm but he could see the worry if he looked deep enough. He focused on matching his breathing with Richie's. 

They stood like this for a few minutes, staring at each other and breathing together. Soon enough Eddie's breath was calm but he didn't look away from Richie, neither did Richie. 

Richie lowered his hand to Eddie's and gave it a squeeze.

"You did so good, you feel better?" He asked

Eddie nodded, he squeezed Richie's hand back. 

Richie didn't know if it was because he was caught in the moment or if it was the pull he felt between Eddie's chest and his own, but he felt like he was leaning towards Eddie. 

Eddie leaned further. They were mere inches apart. 

Neither wanting to close the space between them, or wanting to pull back. 

Richie always was the talkative one, especially when he was nervous.

"I really want to kiss you Eddie." His breath hit Eddie's face, it smelled like coffee. 

"Why don't you Richie?" Eddie glanced at Richie's lips, they looked rough, he wanted to know if they felt rough too.

"What happens if I do? Do you run away?" Richie looked hopeful and hopeless at the same time, Eddie didn't know how he did that.

"No, I'm not sure what happens, but I can tell you I would stick around to find out." 

With that, Richie breaks those few fucking inches.

Richie's rough lips brush Eddie's soft parted ones. Richie never thought a kiss could be so sweet. Both boys almost jerk back with the feeling of their lips pressing against each other, it shouldn't feel this good but it does. The way they fit, Eddie could have sworn he felt them click together like a lock and key. They don't do anything but press lightly and it's enough to have Eddie's head spinning and Richie's stomach jump. 

Then they pull apart and look at each other. Eddie is the one to place the hand that isn't holding Richie's on the back of his neck and pull him in for a slightly deeper kiss. The only difference in this one is the slight movement of lips. Both boys too scared to push too far. 

When pulling away from this kiss, Eddie is smiling, and Richie looks like an idiot. His cheeks are pink and his eyebrows are still raised as if hes still shocked it happened.

"Now we see what happens." Eddie says.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comment what you think! also what is your fav, angst, smut, or fluff? mine is smut cause im a horndog and live for intimacy.


End file.
